10. Naming the Stories We Live In

Hosted by Lizzie and Justin

A conversation that we think will make a new kind of sense now that you have completed Session 3.

Originally recorded for our Turning Towards Life podcast, but with PCC students in mind, we talk about what it is to be someone who can observe and give name to the structures of interpretation - the current narratives - that our clients live from. It takes a particular kind of truthfulness, warmth, care, attunement and safety-making to be able to do this in a way that someone else can hear and make use of.

Naming an interpretation - a way of being - accurately and compassionately can go a long way to laying ground for imagining together a deeper narrative, a possible way of living that is liberating and lets life flow more freely and skilfully, and then finding ways to live into that possibility by practice and self-observation.

40 minutes long

Here's the text we read at the beginning:

What Story Do You Live In?

To live in the world as a human being is always to live in the middle of a story of one kind or another. We all live in a world of interpretation - the particular way we each make sense of the world.

The interpretations we live in profoundly shape the experience we have of life, and the possibilities that open and close for each of us. So shifting our interpretations into ever more life-giving forms might be one of the most important ways we can play a part in our lives. In other words, examining and changing the stories we’re living can be a way to bring about new kinds of personal and collective freedom: the freedom of thought, feeling and action we need in order to respond fully to our lives.

One of the intriguing aspects of the interpretations we live in is that they’re often invisible to us. We may have come by them deliberately and then forgotten them in the midst of the habit and repetition of day to day life. Or we may have entered into them ‘unconsciously’, taking them up in response to the surrounding culture or the family systems we grew up in when we were small. When they’re ‘in the background’ in this way, it can be hard to see how much they shape us. There’s a sense in which it’s easy for us to ‘belong to’ an interpretation rather than having our interpretations consciously and purposefully ‘belong to us’.

This is where integral development coaching can be helpful. Because a skilled coach can be of support in helping us first see and then shift the stories in which we can live, often in liberating and life-giving ways.

It can be wonderful to have someone who will help us observe what we have not yet observed about the stories we live in - someone who will partner with us as we enter into new ways of making sense of our lives that we may never have considered before, and help us find and practice new ways to live them. In this way we can come, over time, first to 'have our stories' rather than being 'had by them', and then to make new ones that can serve our lives more fully. It’s a very creative, joyful and compassionate role to play in support of another person.

9. Healthy Power

Hosted by Neena and Debbie

How can we work with our clients in a way that is powerful, deeply respectful and responsive to their unique world and experience of life? What kind of sensitivity to others does it take in us, and how can we cultivate that? What kind of sensitivity to our own patterns of bringing ourselves forward and holding back does it require? And how can we, in the midst of all that, be sensitive to the dynamics of power in our wider culture, which inevitably shape and affect any coaching relationship and the conversations we have with our clients?

All of these questions are vital for us to be asking and responding to so that our work with our clients can serve their deeper intentions and their life as a whole, and at the same time be sensitive, respectful, mutual and dignified.

8. Making a Space of Welcome

Hosted by Lizzie & Justin

A conversation about the promise of integral development coaching: ways to open in welcome and in loving attention to the possibilities, gifts and suffering of others; and ways to be an invitation to step ‘two steps further along the tightrope’ that our clients may have been walking, so far, alone.

This podcast is adapted from an episode of ‘Turning Towards Life’ that was recorded in response to a poem by Kate Van Akin, who had just certified as an integral development coach, written at the close of PCC Y in 2021. We hope that Kate’s words, and the conversation that arose from it - which we purposefully angled towards coaching and the PCC -  will be a support to you as you step ever deeper in over the coming months.


Where love flows through

May this be a space of welcome
A space where you are seen, unmasked
and bathed in loving attention.
Mine - and your own.
May we discover in our time together
what is peeking out from the shadows
yearning to be noticed.

May our space be big enough to hold
both the stories you tell about yourself
and the truth of your existence.

May I see beyond those stories
to the unique, wondrous beauty of your soul
and may I shine a light on your beauty
and your truth
while honouring and dignifying all parts of you.

May I stand tall in bringing you my observations and offerings
starting close in,
inviting you two steps further along the tightrope
than you may have gone alone.

May this be a space where love flows through,
and where our hearts can speak to each other
freely.

by Kate Van Akin

7. Ongoing Coaching Conversations

Hosted by Justin & Neena

A conversation about ways to think about, practice, and orient yourselves to the many coaching conversations that happen once the container for the programme (EPQ, Current Narrative, Deeper Narrative, the beginnings of practice/observation) are established.

Supporting Materials from the Methodology section:
The Flow of Coaching
The Programme Book: Designing and Conducting a Coaching Programme

5. The Ten Ways: Conversations

Hosted by Amanda & Lizzie
A conversation about the third way of the 10 Ways, the way in which the world of conversations opens up as a vast field of possibility for relationship, understanding, expression, creative imagining, and coordination of action.

There is some pre-reading that will help you listen:
The podcast will make the most sense if you first read about Conversations on p12 (an overview) and pp25-28 (a fuller description) of the ‘Models: The Ten Ways’ section in the methodology notes.

3. The Ten Ways

Hosted by Sue & Justin. 

The Ten Ways is the central developmental model of our methodology. It can help us become ever more sensitive to people’s way of being as they are now, and support us and them in imagining what might be next for them - in a way that meets them with both compassion and wisdom. 

It’s a brilliant resource for designing powerful developmental coaching programmes for our clients, and for finding distinctions that open up new ways of observing and acting.

Starting to get some understanding of this will greatly support our learning together at Session 2.

There is some pre-reading that will help you listen:
The podcast will make the most sense if you first do a bit of reading - please cast your eyes over the whole of the ’Models: The Ten Ways' section in the methodology notes, and read in depth James Flaherty’s introduction which is 4 pages of that file, pp17-21.

2. The Four Human Domains

Hosted by Lizzie and Neena, 56 mins

This podcast explores one of the central models of integral development coaching, which you’ll already have had a brief introduction to on the ‘Foundations’ course.The 4 Human Domains helps us respond to the whole of a person’s life, rather than from our own preferences or familiarity, and helps us keep seeing the person and their life as a mystery to be continually explored and wondered at rather than something to ‘work out’.

There is pre-reading to accompany this:
Please find and read pages 5 to 13 in the notes on ‘The Four Domains’, in the Methodology notes. The conversation will make most sense if you read first.

1. Narratives

This podcast explores what narratives are, and the role they can play both in a coaching programme and in life. You’ll be embarking right now on your own integral development programme, and the podcast will shed light on the different parts of that as well as supporting your future work with clients.Materials to accompany this - p6-11 of the Notes for Session 1 - on ‘The Three Panels’, which you’ll find in Thinkific.