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Hello everyone We recently lost my father in law who had been been diagnosed with a terminal illness 18 months ago. He was a man who lived his life with great enthusiasm and energy, and shortly before his diagnosis has been deep wreck diving in The Philippines - something which seems almost unbelievable now given he had lung cancer and was diagnosed in late stages of the disease. During his illness I read the very brilliant book “ The Wild Edge of Sorrow - Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief” by Francis Weller, in which he brings us this African proverb “When death finds you, be sure it finds you alive” - and certainly this was where death found my father in law: vibrant, wholeheartedly participating in his communities and unapologetic about who he was and what he believed in. Francis Weller reminds us that too many of us suffer from premature death, never fully embracing our lives and being open to the beauty and terror of existence. To be human is to live in exactly that beauty and terror. I think most of us can accept and turn to the beauty but the terror - the very nature of life being loss - well, that’s the bit we avoid and turn away from and have so many skilful ways of distracting and numbing ourselves from in our society. But it’s in the welcome of this loss that we find new vitality rather than fear, connection rather than aloneness, light rather than dark. There’s a great gift to be found in exactly that which what we avoid. And if we want death to find us alive when our turn inevitably comes, it’s essential that we’ve found ways of opening to and folding in our grief and suffering and the loss of everything that has gone before so that we can really see the sacredness of being alive. It’s from this place that it’s possible to cultivate a life lived well. Here’s to being alive. With love,
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